Where to Begin?

Can a cookie participate in concepts of modesty? Would these creatively deployed gumdrops cause Godly men to stumble?  Should these cookies be shamed or policed because of their delicious shape?

I waded into the morass that is modern misogyny in my post about shopping in a gendered world and you’ll see a lot more calling out of ridiculously sexist and absurdly anti-woman things on this blog.  But I’ve run into a problem that, I’m sure, afflicts many new bloggers.  Where do I begin?

How about the almost bar-fight I saw yesterday?  This would be the bar-fight where one drunk man calls another drunk man, “Woman!”, and, if it’s not painfully obvious enough, means it as an insult.  Love that.


How about this Modesty Survey?  This survey asks men to answer how much they might “stumble” based on what women wear, how they stand or walk, or even if their undergarments – like bra straps – become accidentally discernible.  Weee-ooo! Weee-ooo! Weee-ooo!  Calling the body police!  Here are some actual quotes from survey takers on women who wear, let’s say tank tops (57.6% of respondents answered either Agree or Strongly Agree on this statement, “Tank tops are generally immodest.”)

  • “Women like this disgust and frustrate me”
  • “They lure men away from that which they truly love”
  • “They’re distracting good men, dishonoring God and marriage, and offering themselves cheaply”
  • “They make me wary and uncomfortable”

Yes, all you women out there dressing in immodest tank tops, jeans with stitching on the back pockets, and zip sweaters only zipped-up half way (the zipper pull pulls his eyes to your boobs – he has no choice!  That’s why it’s called a zipper pull, ladies.) make men wary, disgusted,  and distracted!  Bonus Points – you dishonor God as well!  Seriously, go and read how these men believe that it is women’s fault that they can’t keep their own eyes and crotches on the straight and narrow.  My tank top makes them sin.

Men aren’t the only ones with eyes.  Women have eyes.  Do women whine and complain that when men waltz around, absolutely flaunting their bodies in jeans that drop below their butt, ties that are left suggestively half untied, or bathing suits that leave half of their body completely naked?  No.  I’m not terribly entertained by random male bodies that might be sporting less than modest wear.  Any other women out there find it difficult to go about their daily routines when they might see a man, oh the scandal, with the top two buttons on his shirt undone?  I thought not.

There’s this old saw about how men are “visual” and women aren’t.  You know what?  I don’t care.  Your inclinations should not determine how other people dress.

Everyday I live my life in a naked body.  So do you.  So does everyone.  We’re all naked under our clothes.  On the bus.  In the classroom.  At work.  On Sunday mornings and Friday nights.  Naked.  Naked is old news.  How much of that nakedness you cover seems a little less important viewed in that light.  For me at least.


Then there’s this : Skinny Girl wines, liquors, and cocktails.  Their website uses “cocktail” as a verb.  Their schtick is that women want to get tipsy but don’t want to “worry about extra calories.”  I checked out their calorie counts with the USDA averages on the same kinds of beverages (play around with their search feature here) and Skinny Girl seems to find a way to shave about 20-30 calories off each serving.  You know how this post is about how I don’t know where to begin on modern misogyny?  I don’t know where to begin on this particular problem of Skinny Girl.

The woman in me is like, ” Ugh, hello awful fifty’s stereotypes!” and, “Who was the marketing genius who decided vodka needed to be gender-specific?”

My inner wine-appreciant recoils when it wonders, “How do you reduce the calories in wine?  All the calories in wine come from either alcohol or the sugar added to sweeten the final product.  Either they’re running alcohol removal, or, egads!, could there be Splenda involved?”

And the plain old rational me adds in, “If you’re going to drink, just drink.  Save your calories, and your liver, by just getting less wasted.”

I think plain old rational me wins this argument.


And finally I will share this gem with you, which I made the bad mistake of starting my morning off with.  If you’re too wimpy (or maybe too wise) to follow the link here’s an overview : Mark Driscoll of Mars Hill Church talks about how men have “headship” over their wives.  He’s quick to point out that he isn’t a misogynist, though all these annoying people keep seeming to think he is, because submitting to a husband is good for a wife.    See?  He wants good things for women, therefore, not a misogynist.

Mark Driscoll is a whole other post, maybe a whole other blog.  His outrageous claims about the nature of men and women, his constant intimations of violence, and his totally un-Christlike demeanor (I can easily imagine Mr. Driscoll as the angry, sneering, judgmental man who hauls the humiliated woman caught in adultery before Jesus) just push every button I have.  We’re going to leave Mr. Driscoll for another day because my outrage-o-meter is offline since dealing with the Modesty Survey.  A thorough dealing with Mr. Driscoll is an outrage-a-thon all of it’s own and deserves outrage equipment in tiptop shape.

So that’s our overview of modern misogyny for the day.  We end because I’m tired of typing, not for lack of material.  Keep your chins up ladies.  We’ll get through it yet.

This entry was posted in America's Confusion, Christianity's Confusion and tagged , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

2 Responses to Where to Begin?

  1. Rachel says:

    Can you blame men for blaming everything on women? They have been taught that from a young age, I mean the story of Adam and Eve? When Eve took a bite of that apple and suddenly tank tops became immodest

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